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Also the person who has suffered longer may have more memory of suffering and they may have fallen into a life where they have forgotten what it was like to feel normal, where the person who has suffered a few months, still has these feelings of normality close to them.

As people know I suffered for ten years, so I had certainly built up a lot of habits and memory of suffering was pretty strong, I had just got used to not feeling normal and it actually began to feel normal in my world, I had known nothing else for so long.

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One of the most popular articles we have ever written here was an article titled Freeing the Parents of Adult Alcoholics and Addicts.

I played the warden, the mother, the victim, the friend, the cheerleader, the therapist, the lover, the detective, the savior and when all of that failed I gave you space.

You gave me promises of when you would change and how you would change.

This lead us to an obvious conclusion: there are a lot of parents out there searching for ways to extricate themselves from the manipulative clutches of their addicted, adult children. How do parents who dearly loves their addicted sons or daughters best help their children?

Do you continue to meet their unending demands for money or do you go to the other extreme and follow a “tough-love” approach, cutting off all contact with them until they straighten up? Offering to pay for treatment, when they are ready, is a good start—assuming the treatment is one of the more effective options, rather than the standard, in our opinion, ineffectual, offerings of the AA/12-step/Minnesota Model.

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